© David LylesAn excerpt from David Lyles' Creative Writing 101 tutorial
Maybe if They'd Named Her Otis . . .
In the Proctology Lab
Jean Luc's Reverie
The Polyamorist
An excerpt from David Lyles' Creative Writing 101 tutorial:
In the telling of any story, there are many choice points where the writer has opportunity
to color the action with detail, and make curious and interesting things happen. For instance,
in telling a story of a fellow taking a walk in the woods, you could have him practicing his
public speaking skills as he walks along, articulating the sound of, say, the letter "A" in all
its manifestations. Then, he comes upon a branching of four paths, each marked with a little sign:
A, B , C , and D. Have him choose to follow the one marked "B."
So off he goes, walking along cheerfully at first and whistling a little tune to himself. But as he
walks further he notices a darkening in the woods, and an uneasy feeling that's creeping
into his consciousness. Have him then come upon a clearing in the woods, where there are four
chairs lined up. Each one has a different letter painted on its back: A, B, C, and D. Each chair looks
the same, with the exception of the one on the far end, the one marked "D," which has a small
object resting on its seat. Upon investigation, the man sees that it is a bottle labeled "C,"
along with the instruction to "Drink Me." So he sits down, and, like Alice on her way into Wonderland,
drinks the potion. He is immediately filled with a stomach-churning sense of pervasive dread,
ill-will and doom.
Which development shouldn't surprise any attentive reader at this point, given that you,
as the author, have turned this story into a tale of "A" diction, "B" trail, "C" sickness and "D" seat.
Maybe if They'd Named Her Otis . . .
Did you know that in the original drafts of the first Star Wars movie Darth Vader had a
philosopher sister? In on the ground floor of plot development, some writers argued that
Ella Vader would lift the level of intellectual appeal, raising the film above that of a mere
one-story action picture. Her stock rose and fell throughout the early rewrites, until, finally,
her character was given the shaft and dropped.
In the Proctology Lab
The scene was not pretty in his proctology lab when, stopping by late at night
to retrieve some notes, Dr. Fulbright-Moon came upon the two night janitors
sweeping up the remains of fourteen large trays of carefully labelled stool samples
and glass slides, spilled out of an overturned cabinet and scattered across the floor.
"You idiots!" he screamed. "Look what you have done! You've destroyed a whole year
of my research by your carelessness!"
Had he thought them capable of such sophistication, the good doctor might have detected
more than a whiff of personal insult in their immediate denial of responsibility:
"Hey, we did'n' do it!" one shouted back.
To which the other added, "Yeah, ain' us wrecked 'em!"
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Jean Luc's Reverie
"God, she's beautiful!" were the words that came into Jean-Luc Picard's mind the moment
immediately after he had happened to turn his head to his left and caught sight of
Counselor Troi -- or, to be more accurate, how magnificently Counselor Troi's breasts
filled her Starfleet uniform as she sat at full attention, tensed and, he thought, in
some arousal in the danger of the full-frontal Romulan attack playing out on the screen
they were both facing.
So it was into the reverie of possibilities in which he had fallen that Riker's voice
broke through with the urgent-edged words: "Captain? Now would seem a good time
for us to make haste. . ." -- words which, upon registering in his consciousnss,
shook Jean-Luc back into the reality of the Enterprise's peril, caused him to recall
to mind the plan that had been worked out, and to thrust his forefinger ahead,
resolutely uttering the needed command:
"Engorge!"
The Polyamorist
This fellow wanted to have his Kate, and Edith, too.
